My bad luck with bitches named Amber

So lets see here...

My ex-girlfriend Amber got knocked up and at 8 months claimed I was the father. Of course, afterwards admitted she lied to me and originally cheated on me while we went out and got knocked up. So much fun there. And then today, this disgusting slut Amber at my job (to make a long story short) backed up into my fucking new car for no apparant reason other than to be a raging retard. Luckily, it's as plain as day that her insurance will be covering all the damages done to my car, and I have over 10 witnesses that are in agreement that it was her fault. But man how much a day can differ. Yesterday was such an amazing day and today was such filth. To add insult to injury, get this... At the time of the accident, I was on my way back from Chipotle so had to get insurance info and stuff and didn't get to eat my burrito until later. But the catch is that I didn't get to eat it AT ALL because when I opened it up 3 hours later, it wasn't hot so the tortilla had unraveled and my burrito splattered all over the pavement. I wanted to cry.